It’s back to school time again. I brought my six-year-old son Seer to the hair saloon for a hair cut on Sunday. While he is doing his hair cut, I decided to let them shampoo my hair at the same time.

Soon after he finished his hair cut (now he looks sweeter and smarter ), he quickly comes to me and ask: “mom, why are you shampoo your hair here? Is your shampoo at home finished?”.

I’m sorry but I am so busy, I’ll have to cancel our meeting. I’m sorry but I can’t come on the course with you on Saturday because I am a bit short of money right now. I’m sorry but I just don’t have any energy. I just need a holiday and then I will be fine. I’m sorry but nothing appears to be working out at the moment. I’m sorry but……….

These are some of the numerous excuses people have used to us over the years. Do any of these sound familiar to you? Is this the way you run your life? Do you feel as though you are constantly chasing your tail. Is your life full of excuses?

A few years ago Jane came into our lives. Julie had advertised for a sales person and Jane applied. First glance told you she was having a hard time. Although clean and smartly dressed, her clothes had seen better days andher shoes although clean and polished were down at heel and in need of replacement. However she was really good at the interview, had a really lovely attitude and Julie decided to give her the job. It was one of the best decisions Julie has ever made.

It later transpired that Jane had answered Julie’s advertisement at the end of her tether. She had reached the bottom. Nothing was going right for her. She had blamed all the world for the state she was in. For the failure in her relationship. For the collapse of her business. For the mounting bills she could not pay. But she had come to realise that she could either continue in this ‘blame culture’ or take responsibility for herself and her life. Fortunately, she chose the latter.

The first thing she realised was, to improve her situation she had to change. Obviously what she was currently doing wasn’t working so there had to be another way. She had graduated on dreams, wishes, hopes and waiting for other people to act. None had produced the goods. All that was left was to take a hard look at herself and change whatever it was that was causing the problem. Over a period of time She came to realise that the problem was her. Her belief in herself. She had lost it. In all the turmoil she had forgotten herself. Once she had acknowledged to herself that her life was not right, change was possible and natural.

Julie got her to focus on what she was good at. Her ability to build relationships very quickly. Her ability to gain people’s trust quickly. Her honesty. Her genuine love for others. Her ability to listen deeply without interruption. Her ability to sell. Gradually as she sold more and more product, her confidence returned. She started to overcome the self doubt and the fears. She started to believe in herself again.

Gradually Jane got back on her feet again. Repaid all her debts and took a mortgage on a small flat. Then when she felt she was ready she left to return to the love in her life: buying and selling antique lace. Jane recently found a new man to share her life with and she is now confidently living her dream.

When you lack confidence all the world seems to be against you and you seem to get caught in a downward spiral. Just look at sportspeople when their confidence is low they stop winning, they stop being able to do what was second nature to them before. Frustration takes over and when frustration is the master then the world goes pear shaped. It becomes everybody else’s fault. It’s the same with you. Confidence is the key.

But how do you get your confidence back? Usually either with someone believing in you and reminding you of your talents or by taking a good look at yourself and remembering what you are good at. Your strengths if you like.

Then practice. Going back to the training field and re-practicing all you strengths until they become second nature again. Do what Jane did. Put yourself in a position where you have to practice day in day out and gradually you will regain confidence in your strengths. It is strange but sports people accept that the way to develop and grow is through practice but in everyday life we think that we can just get on with it. Let me give you an example.

A few years ago Julie and I used to teach a meditation course. At the beginning of the course we would explain the benefits of meditation and suggest that each person starts with five minutes in the morning and if possible five minutes in the evening. Within a week or two students would be ’phoning us to tell us that were no longer attending the course because they found that they could not meditate. They had sat down but found it impossible to concentrate and decided that it was not for them. You see, they were unwilling to practice. We don’t know anyone who is able to sit down and meditate immediately. It takes time and practice like everything else in life.

Often to regain your confidence you have to change your attitude. We have learned that there is no such thing as I can’t……. there is only I couldn’t be bothered or I am unwilling to put the time in at the moment or I won’t because……. I don’t have time…….. I couldn’t possibly ……….. It’s no use …… I’ve tried but……. To get your confidence back you have to put in effort on yourself. You have to identify your strengths and keep practicing. You have to desire a different life. A different way of living.

Use: of course when…. instead of I’m sorry but …..

Graham and Julie
www.desktop-mediation.com

Graham and Julie live in the Canary Islands where they pursue their love for writing, photography and spirituality. To see more if their work please go to: http://www.desktop-meditation.com

Learn How to Re-Program your Mind and Body and Reach your Goals Automatically….. In just a Few Minutes

The below is quoted from Christopher Westra’s newsletter:

“We think we fear something external, but the external situation is just a mirror of our internal beliefs. We attracted the experience.

What we really fear is within us, and the key to overcoming fear is awareness. Awareness mixed with love and acceptance will overcome all fear.”

And he also suggested us to “Observe your fear as if you were a “witness”, and ask God
to show you what you really fear. ”

Can we do it? will I do it? I keep asking myself and I really can’t give myself a firm answer, how about you?

Your Life Path Number is 8

Your purpose in life is to help others succeed. You are both a natural leader and a natural success. You are also a great judge of character.You have a head for business and finance. You know how to make money. A great visionary, you can see gold where other people see nothing. In love, you are very generous - with gifts, time, and guidance. You love to inspire people, but it can be frustrating when they don’t understand your vision. Great success comes easily for you. But so does great failure, as you are very reckless. You are confident, and sometimes this confidence borders on arrogance.

What Is Your Life Path Number?

Sometimes, it’s really wonderful to be, male-less

This is a male-less Sunday, I did not hang out with any guy friends, nor my ex or any male family members, even my son is going out with his father, this gave me a totally male-less day!

Hanging out with my female friends, chatting, laughing … great!

She called me again, at night, and asked me what to do next.

I’m feeling tired, and unbearable, honestly. She did not get what I mean, at all, since the beginning. She refuses to think, she refuses to takes the responsibility, too. I’m not trying to abandon her, it’s just not my duty to live her life for her.

Received an email from a friend with an article that might change the way we look at life. At the end of the article it leaves a message to encourage us to send this message to those people who mean something to us, to those who have touched our life in one way or another, to those who make us smile when we really need it, to those that make us see the brighter side of things when we are really down, to those who we want to let them know that we appreciate their friendship.

I choose to re-post it here and share it with you:

Have you ever, at any one time, had the feeling that life is bad, real bad, and you wish you were in another situation?

You find life make things difficult for you, work sucks, life sucks, everything seems to go wrong…

Read the following story… it may change your views about life:

After a conversation with one of my friends, he told me despite taking 2 jobs, he brings back barely above 1K per month, he is happy as he is.

I wonder how he can be as happy as he is considering he has to skimp his life with the low pay to support a pair of old parents, in-laws, a wife, 2 daughters and the many bills of a household.

He explained that it was through one incident that he saw in India that happened a few years ago when he was really feeling low and touring India after a major setback.

>He said that right in front of his very eyes he saw an Indian mother chop off her child’s right hand with a chopper. The helplessness in the mother’s eyes, the scream of pain from the innocent 4-year-old child haunted him until today.

You may ask why did the mother do so; had the child been naughty, had the child’s hand been infected?? No, it was done for two simple words—TO BEG!

The desperate mother deliberately caused the child to be handicapped so that the child could go out to the streets to beg.

Taken aback by the scene, he dropped a piece of bread he was eating half-way. And almost instantly, a flock 5 or 6 children swamped towards this small piece of bread which was covered with sand, robbing bits from one another. The natural reaction of hunger.

Stricken by the happenings, he instructed his guide to drive him to the nearest bakery. He arrived at two bakeries and bought every single loaf of bread he found in the bakeries. The owner was dumbfounded but willingly sold everything. He spent less than $100 to obtain about 400 loaves of bread (this is less than $0..25 per loaf) and spent another $100 to get daily necessities.

Off he went in the truck full of bread into the streets. As he distributed the bread and necessities to the children (mostly handicapped) and a few adults, he received cheers and bows from these unfortunate. For the first time in his life he wondered how people can give up their dignity for a loaf of bread which cost less than $0.25.

He began to tell himself how fortunate he is. How fortunate he is to be able to have a complete body, have a job! , have a family, have the chance to complain what food is nice and what isn’t nice, have the chance to be clothed, have the many things that these people in front of him are deprived of…

Now I begin to think and feel it, too! Was my life really that bad?

Perhaps… no, I should not feel bad at all… What about you? Maybe the next time you think you are, think about the child who lost one hand to beg on the streets.

“Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, it is the realization of how much you already have.”

When the door of happiness closes, another opens, but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don’t see the one which has been opened for us.

It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it, but it’s also true that! we don’t know what we’ve been missing until it arrives.

The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past,you can’t go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

Author unknown